All 'Dolly'ed up and nowhere to go

I've never heard a Dolly Parton song covered in a way to make it stand out.

I know what you are thinking, "But what about that cover, BBF?" I will grant you the benefit of decent musical taste and assume that you definitely did not mean this particular horror of a cover:

I Will Always Love You (cover) - Whitney Houston
This song is about self sacrifice. Whitney could not emote that feeling if her life (or coke) depended on it. It's all about her and her dramatic flair ("Bobbay! Where are you, Bobbay? Are you listening to me sing about my hardships in my love for you, Bobbay? What, this isn't loud enough you @#$%? Is THIS loud enough? How about THIS?")



I Will Always Love You - Dolly Parton
Now, this? This is underhanded guilt infliction through a perfect tone of doormat submissiveness twinged with real regret and a little sexpot trill thrown in. Perfect.



No, no, you say. Of course, not that cover. Oh, this is the one you meant?

Jolene (cover) - White Stripes
Yeah. No. That's all.



Jolene - Dolly Parton
(Jack? This is how a real [wo]man begs.)



Aha, you say. But did you hear about the lovely Mariann's cover?

Down From Dover (cover) - Mariann Faithfull
I admit, when I first learned of this cover, I thought, finally! Yes, she can do it. So I rushed out to listen to it and...oh, it's good. It's really good. But I feel a bit let down. Because I think if Mariann had sung this as if she was looking back--sitting in the dark corner of a pub, nursing a pint (out of many), chainsmoking, harshly laughing at anyone passing her table, eventually snagging some unsuspecting or unfortunate customer and leaning forward, harsh lines etched on her face thrown into relief in the light, mostly with an eye to get her next drink picked up simply as payment to get away from her--with no note of regret or longing in any line? THAT would've been brilliant and she could've pulled it off. She should've pulled it off. It would have been the perfect counterpoint to Dolly's version.



Down From Dover - Dolly Parton