So much for the happy ending

(Note: There really was a whole 'nother post intended for tonight, but I kind needed to get this out of y system before the weekend started, because seriously, who wants to head into the supposed days of rest with this floating around in their head?)

Most married folk argue heatedly about money, or family, or sex (or lack of), or just general crumminess of life at that moment. We come to [almost] verbal blows over songs about and around abuse and violence related to it. Over lunch.

Yeah, I know, you wish you could be seated at the table with us.

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It started out innocently enough, with me humming along to 'Janie's Got a Gun' playing on muzak overhead (I know), and making a comment about how some of the catchiest tunes have pretty dark, heavy lyrics. Somehow, in the span of 15-20 minutes, we were putting artists on trial as to whether or not having an upbeat tune to an downbeat issue actually helps enhance the message or diminishes it. Must a painful message that is pretty horrific, no matter how you look at it, be expressed just as painfully, or should it be joyful, as if to send a screw you message to the perpetrator(s)? Does it make a difference if the singer is portraying the voice of the abused or abuser, when it comes to setting the tone? Is it more poignant to sing about one kind versus another?

I am sure our dining neighbors were enchanted with the topic they could eavesdrop on, although I am not sure how much they could hear. We've gotten exceptionally good at having heated conversations at a very level and almost monotonous tone, so as not to get the kid worked up. So if you weren't really listening to the words, we probably dismissed as discussing the latest predictions in weather.

The jabbing fork, though, would've been hard to overlook.

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These are some of the songs that came up in our discussion. I know there are a lot of classics that I'm skipping over (and that was another part of the argument: do you want to call something that is about such a heavy topic, a classic?). We talked about some of the deceptively catchy tunes that may almost distract you from what is being said. I think the catchiness works precisely because you find yourself singing or humming along and almost definitely catch yourself, realizing rather shamefacedly what you were happily trilling to. Done right, I think it is far more effective than a dark dirge-like delivery, no?

Run For Your Life - The Beatles
Those clean cut kids show that when you're from Liverpool? You're not really that clean cut.



Hands Clean -Alanis Morissette
I find this far more likely to stick in my head that her better known anthem, even though they're technically about the same topic.



Goodbye Earl - The Dixie Chicks
Is it weird to describe a song about domestic violence going full circle as a crazy-fun one?



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Then there are the ones which are definitely more serious in tone, but still employ a tune that doesn't sting so much as it stirs a steady beat you'll remember long after:

The Wolf - Catie Curtis
Woefully underrated artist



Janie's Got a Gun - Aerosmith
There's always the one that starts it all, in my posts, isn't there?




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And then there are the ones which just are. You can't really categorize them. You shouldn't categorize them:

He Hit Me (And It Felt Like A Kiss) (cover) - The Motels
In a way, this would have been catchy but the absolute denial lends an eerie tone that just makes it chilling



Delia's Gone - Johnny Cash
This song is brilliant. Evil, almost oblivious self-righteousness depicted to perfection. Gives me a jolt everytime I hear it; it's fucking scary, as it should be.



Me And a Gun - Tori Amos
Not the same actual experience, but this is like a sucker punch every time I hear it:
"It's kind of funny things you think
at times like these
Like I haven't seen Barbados
So I must get out of this"



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I promise our weekend lunch conversation will be more upbeat.