It's weird, how I suddenly realize certain things are never going to happen ever again. I'm never going to say I had a mom-cooked meal. I'll never see my mom in my house. I'm never going to take my mom shopping. I'll never be able to ask her advice. I'll never feel better thinking I can tell her my worries.
She's here, still, in a quite a number of ways, but she's also gone forever, in a lot of ways that mean so much more.
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My hearts hurts. It literally hurts.
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I'm letting myself cry twice a day: once in the shower, and once at night when everyone is sleeping.
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Getting vibes of Ralph McTell, for sure, but someone/something else, too. I'm way past tired to try and figure it out and it really doesn't matter anymore.*
*Update: Warren Zevon, a bit
Pacing The Cage (live) - Bruce Cockburn
1 comment:
Oh, god, I am so behind on everything, I had no idea. I am sorry. I am sorry I did not know, and I am sorry for what is happening to you, to your mom, to your family. I am so sorry.
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