What not to do: The F.R.O.G. in a funk edition

In a black funk? Here is a F.R.O.G. handy tutorial on what not to do in the following categories in attempts to draw yourself out of it.

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Books:

Don't

- Pick up the book Reservation Road by mistake, thinking it is Revolutionary Road, and start reading it. Not that the latter is a barrel of laughs, either, but the former? Ends its first chapter on every parent's worst nightmare, written so meticulously matter-of-fact that it will make you instinctively call out for your child or a child near and dear to you.

- Finish the book Reservation Road on the premise that the worst has already happened, how much more depressing can it get? (Guess the answer, genius.)

- Switch to Revolutionary Road, not having learnt your lesson, apparently, because what you need at this moment is yet another well written book about the complete fuckup that is life and relationships.

Music:

Don't

- Listen to Elliott Smith. You know and I know he is the master of eloquently describing all the reasons to slit your wrists. Do you honestly need to revalidate that, after all these years?

The Biggest Lie - Elliott Smith



Pisteleh - Elliot Smith



- Decide listening to Elliot Smith is cliche and move on to a CD that you yourself once described as the ultimate post-breakup-'waaah'llow-in-my-misery-album, from beginning to end. What, the slit wrists wasn't enough, you have to go rub coarse salt into them?

Positive - Marry Me Jane

- Switch to your favorite radio station and stupidly continue to listen, even though it is the Sunday morning program that always has that one song that you would rather forget. (And don't go playing the song five times in row--what is this, the lime juice squeeze topping off the salt rub?)

Bombed - Mark Lanegan



Movies:

Don't

- Think this is a good time to reconnect with your roots and go dig out movies from back home. Dash Akol is not an uplifting romantic movie, anymore than Gaav is a hilarious comedy.

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You're welcome.